| Episode | Gallery | Transcript |
| Food Battle 2009 | |
|---|---|
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| Episode Information | |
| Release date: | July 17, 2009 (Smosh) October 5, 2012 (El Smosh) |
| Views (approximate): | 14,000,000+ |
| Anthony's Favorite Food: | Burrito |
| Winner: | Ian Hecox |
| Episode Guide | |
| Previous Food Battle 2008 |
Next Food Battle 2010 |
- "SEX"
-SEX - "Bring it on, chode-knocker!"
-Ian
Food Battle 2009 is a Smosh video released on July 17, 2009 and is the fourth installment in the famous Food Battle series.
Plot[]
Introduction[]
Anthony has just finished a 10 year sentence for illegal drug trafficking in the state of Vermont (specifically "Panton" Vermont). Ian goes to pick him up and they immediately start beefing over some old business, they had an unfinished "food battle" they fight it out in style in Ians dirty cabin in the woods, things get steamy, nude and as batdan himself would say it about a pani caliber gt "sexyyyyyyy"
Challenges[]
Toothbrush[]
Anthony: Anthony's Burrito Tries to Brush his teeth. Result: X
Ian: Ian's Donut Tries to Brush his teeth and said "My dentist gonna be so proud!" Result: X
Shovel[]
Ian: Ian's donut crumbles while he is digging. After getting his X he eats it. Result: X
Anthony: Anthony successfully digs up a vase, and the merchant from Resident Evil 4 (played by Ian) buys it from him for $11. Result: ✓
Wig[]
Donut vs Burrito
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a7qPBU0vLxk
Video Game[]
https://www.youtube.com/user/JamesNintendoNerd
Boomerang[]
When Anthony suggests this, Ian has drastically changed. Anthony asks what has happened to him, Ian suddenly returns to normal.
Ian: Ian throws his donut, and the merchant is seen holding the vase he bough from Anthony while singing a Michael Jackson song. Ian's donut hits the vase, causing the merchant to drop it onto the ground, breaking it. Result: X
Anthony: Anthony throws his burrito, and it begins to fly back to him. However it passes him shouting 'See ya later fag*ot!' It then gets shredded in a jet engine while Anthony watches, confused. Result: ✓
Mind Control Device[]
Anthony: Anthony tries to hypnotize a girl into kissing him, but she walks off disgusted. Result: X
Ian: Ian attempts to hypnotize the same girl. It at first appears to work, but then she vomits on him, and he screams "What the fu-", but the rest of his lines are cut off. Result: X
Edible Food[]
Anthony gives Ian some seemingly ordinary brownies and Ian eats them all in one sitting like a fat fuck, it turns out these brownies were weed edibles laced with heroin and crack, this ends up making Ian believe he is black, he goes to the store completely nude and calls a black person "my n-word" the black man smashes his head into the back of a truck and leaves a big dent in Ians head.
Ending[]
Ian reveals that he had put cyanide in Anthony's burrito. Anthony protests that it will kill him, but Ian still believes that he is a zombie. After telling Ian that he is not a zombie, Anthony dies.
The reporter runs up to Ian, but Anthony's husband appears and challenges Ian into a duel for killing his wife. He pulls out a corn dog from Anthony's burrito and charges at Ian, but Ian dodges and sends the man into a viewing room for a Susan Boyle sex tape. The reporter asks Ian what he wants to do now, and Ian replies that he wants to go watch paint dry. The reporter joins him and continuosly asks if the paint is dry. Eventually, Ian loses his temper, turns to the reporter and yells "NO!".
After the ending, Barney tells the viewers to go to Smosh.com to watch the video bloopers and to buy the new shirt and Donut Massacre 64 poster, saying "If you don't go to Smosh.com right now, I'm gonna kill you in your sleep!"
Characters mike metais 10 inch cock[]
Main[]
Minor[]
Trivia[]
I go through my day pretty normal like, I'm a normal guy, I'm a swell guy, I'm a nice enough guy, I'm a cool kind of guy, I'm a pretty groovy guy...but then I get a little SUGAR in me and start to go KOO-KOO. Doesn't have to be much, this time it was two of 'em Fiber One brownies. Only 90 calories each but they do the job. Do you know what I'm sayin'? They get me goin', they get me riled up, a little KOO-KOO, a little WACKY, start gettin' me a little KOOKY, a little, y'know, LOOPY-- OOO. Hey, somebody get this kid in a padded cell! Someone get him a straitjacket! He's gettin' a little WACKY..ooo...a little KOOKY! He's off the walls, bananas, loco! You want me to stop. Isn't that wonderful? Well, let me just do what you say, because it's your little fairy tale...
 : Food Battle Series
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