Character Gallery Quotes

Crack Dealer
Gender: Male
Species: Human
Hair color: Brown
Personal Information
  Hobo and Crack Dealer
  Selling drugs
Production Information
First Appearance:
  Food Battle 2013
Played by:
Lee Eisenhower

Crack Dealer is the minor character in Food Battle 2013.


Ian tries to use donut to purchase crack, but trips on a cardboard head and starts falling towards a sword. After flailing a lot, Ian narrowly escapes being impaled by a sword. Anthony comes in complaining that his gummy snake predicted that Ian would die and Anthony would win. Ian says that it's "crazy as balls," but since Ian said the trigger word from earlier, he hits himself with a stuffed cat and is then "killed" by a sword after he falls into it as Anthony says that he is a winner. Ian somehow survives being impaled because his mom's bra stopped the sword before it could kill him. Ian throws the sword into the air, sticking it onto the ceiling. Anthony and Ian hug after realizing that they should be friends and not wish for their deaths. As they hug, the crack dealer says that the hug is "gay as balls." Ian is still under the effects of the hypnotism and hits himself with the donut, breaking the hug. The sword falls off the ceiling and impales Anthony, killing him.